The dress code of the first date: 5 simple rules so that it does not become the last

How to dress for the first date so that the invitation to the second one follows as soon as possible is a task that requires a special approach. We asked a style expert to help us figure it out.

Дресс-код первого свидания: 5 простых правил, чтобы оно не стало последним

A frame from the movie “The Oath”

The very concept of a “dress code for a first date” may seem ridiculous. After all, this is not about hiring a new job, a Nobel Prize ceremony, or an official dinner in the royal family. However, according to psychologists, dating looks more like an interview format every year, especially for those who are “a little over thirty”.

The first date, as in the case of employment, may well be the last. At the end of the meeting, both understand exactly whether they want to see each other again or not. It’s good if the desires coincide. And here a quite logical question arises: is it worth putting “dust in the eyes” of the employer, that is, the potential second half, or stick to Gogol’s “love us black, and everyone will love us white”?

Дресс-код первого свидания: 5 простых правил, чтобы оно не стало последним

Frame from the movie “Office romance”

Let’s start with the fact that no one is obliged to love us not only “black”, but even “white”. Any normal person goes on a date expecting, if not wonderful feelings and magic, then at least a pleasant pastime. And certainly no one plans to clean up the “blackie” to a diamond shine, which may later turn out to be a fake. We should also not forget that any relationship, and even more so the emerging ones, require certain efforts on both sides. If a woman or a man did not bother to take proper care of their appearance before the first date, then this indicates either a lack of interest in themselves and in a potential object of love, or an open unwillingness to invest any resource in these relationships.

Дресс-код первого свидания: 5 простых правил, чтобы оно не стало последним

A shot from the movie “Cinderella” (2015)

A dress code is information encoded in appearance about a person’s desire to match the situation, look decent in it and demonstrate respect for others.

If all of the above is included in your plans for a romantic meeting, you should familiarize yourself with the basic rules of the dress code for a first date.                   

Rule 1: The best version of yourself

The first and most important rule is to remain yourself and “not to show off”. It is ridiculous to recommend a flighty extravagant nature to play an elegant lady on a first date. But “making the sound a little quieter” definitely won’t hurt. It is important not to change yourself, but at the same time it would be nice to demonstrate your best version: highlight the advantages, obscure the disadvantages. 

Дресс-код первого свидания: 5 простых правил, чтобы оно не стало последним

A frame from the movie “Love happens”

For example, you are sure that trousers suit you more than dresses: in this case, you should ignore most of the recommendations of stylists and wear them on your first date. I don’t rule out that you just haven’t found your dress yet, and perhaps you are a “woman—trousers”. Everyone has their own charisma and sexuality, and your task is to find it and emphasize it favorably.

Rule 2: Wear checked items

It is worth choosing for a date the outfit that will add confidence and tranquility to you. A first date is always exciting. And since a true woman will find a lot of reasons for anxiety, then at least clothes should not cause concern. On a date, you need to listen carefully to your chosen one and enjoy communication, and not think about how a new dress fits. You never know how a recently purchased and not yet tested thing will behave in real life, how comfortable a new pair of shoes will be. Worn feet in blood, a wounded or “creating a restless creak” gait, a grimace of suffering on the face may not interfere with a great bright love, but they will definitely spoil the evening. 

Дресс-код первого свидания: 5 простых правил, чтобы оно не стало последним

A shot from the movie “A date with a star”

That is why I recommend both men and women to dress comfortably and comfortably. Please do not confuse it with sweatpants and Olympians, worn-out shoes and knocked-down pads: “comfortable and comfortable” should not come into confrontation with “elegant and refined”.

Rule 3: Don’t overdo it

Nothing that can be “too much”! Too mini or too floor-length, too tight or too shapeless, too provocative or too modest. No extremes! This rule also applies fully to makeup and perfume. It’s a well-known fact: men like natural girls (but you and I know how much this “naturalness” costs us). A win—win option is nude makeup. Do not overuse with bright, highly shiny, black shadows and eyeliners, and even more so try “something new” from the first makeup artist you come across. The same applies to the hairdresser: the first date is not a platform for experiments.

Дресс-код первого свидания: 5 простых правил, чтобы оно не стало последним

A frame from the k/f “On the grounds of compatibility”

Now about the smells. You are going to a rendezvous, take a shower or bath, apply body and face cream, style your hair, make up and complete this whole palette of fragrances with your favorite perfumes. Due to the fact that the perfume is beloved, and you are in a high, exciting mood, you do not feel your fragrance to the full and, just in case, apply the last stunning chord. Don’t do this if you don’t want to “strangle” your date. In addition, he may well be allergic to one of the components. The principle of “better under- than over-” in this case works flawlessly.

It is also not worth giving up perfume altogether. You should give off a subtle, intriguing smell that is unique to you. This will create a sensual atmosphere and usually lingers in the memory for a very long time. 

Rule 4: where, when, with whom

Дресс-код первого свидания: 5 простых правил, чтобы оно не стало последним

A frame from the movie “At the mercy of the Moon”

The stylist’s formula “3K: where, when, with whom” will help you out in any situation, and the first date is no exception. By answering just three simple questions, you will be able to look appropriate and feel confident at any event. Agree, there is a difference between a walk in the park, a late dinner at a restaurant, a country picnic and a non-binding coffee in a cozy city cafe after lunch. The time of the meeting plays an important role: during the day we prefer smart casual or casual chic, and after 20:00 a more sensual makeup and a higher degree of elegance are not forbidden (not to be confused with floor-length dresses, they are on the red carpet, not on a date!).

Of course, the weather and seasonality also need to be taken into account. If it’s winter outside, and there’s an evil minus outside the window, it makes sense to take a taxi and think about the way back. There is nothing more unpleasant than walking the “road of shame” (as one of the bloggers dubbed her) in a sexy dress early in the morning after a night of love. As you understand, we are not talking about the first date, but about the first intimate one (although sometimes they coincide). It is clear that a man after such a night should borrow his sweater, take him home, take him or put him in a taxi, but in life it happens in different ways. Therefore, to have with you the amount that will allow you to pay for yourself in the restaurant (just in case!) and taking a taxi is considered nowadays not just a good tone, but a necessity.

Дресс-код первого свидания: 5 простых правил, чтобы оно не стало последним

A frame from the movie “The Oath”

And finally, the third letter “K” — with whom. Here you have all the cards in your hands, because only you can feel that your cavalier is closer to your heart. After all, the first chemistry has already happened, since he decided to invite you on a date, and you agreed. From the obvious: if your chosen one has been serving in government structures or in business for a long time, where a business suit is like a second skin for him, then you should wear something more conservative and elegant on a date, but this should not contradict your picture of the world (see the first rule).

If, on the contrary, a potential cavalier is far from officialdom, he can’t stand ties and black derbies, then something more relaxed and romantic should be preferred to the famous sheath dress. I don’t recommend classic boring cases for a date to anyone at all.

Modern trends offer so many interesting solutions that a form-fitting midi dress looks too straight against their background. An exception can be made for the owners of impeccable figures and those for whom the classic in its most conservative incarnation is a personal style. In case of certain doubts, it would be appropriate to ask a man how he is going to dress. Young people often go to the theater in jeans and sneakers, and the question “on the shore” will help to avoid discomfort when meeting.

Rule 5: Smile!

Дресс-код первого свидания: 5 простых правил, чтобы оно не стало последним

A frame from the movie “Love happens”

General tips for men

Grooming and neatness. A neat haircut, a well-groomed beard or a clean-shaven face, a manicure, a fresh look, a light fragrance of perfume, clean ironed things, clean and relatively new shoes. This is out of the question!

Дресс-код первого свидания: 5 простых правил, чтобы оно не стало последним

A shot from the movie “A date with a star”

The right socks. Socks should fit the leg tightly and be so high that, no matter how you sit, your beautiful naked and hairy legs could not get into the young lady’s view. It is a mistake to believe that black socks fit everything. Socks are usually selected in the color of shoes or trousers, or in the color of both. The latter option is suitable for jeans and informal appearance.

A compliment to the chosen one! There is no need to comment on this.

TV producer, fashion and style expert, www.mareevastyle.ru . A successful blogger, stylist, expert in the field of personal style, self-presentation, the ability to manage impressions, social and business communication, men’s suits, fashion trends.

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