Confident or indecisive: what underwear will tell you about your self-esteem (not everything is so simple)

It is considered that a confident woman always wears luxurious underwear. Why, in fact, girls with low self-esteem often hide behind high heels, uncomfortable mini and prickly lace, a psychologist, an eating disorders consultant will tell.

Уверенная или нерешительная: что нижнее белье расскажет о вашей самооценке (не все так просто)

Many have heard the story about how the director of the film “Gone with the Wind” Victor Fleming asked Vivien Leigh, the performer of the role of Scarlett, to wear no less chic lace pantaloons under a vintage dress.

“But I don’t plan on undressing in the frame,” Vivien objected.

To which the director retorted:

— You don’t have to do it, but you will feel what kind of underwear you are wearing.

What does a confident woman choose: beautiful or comfortable?

Perhaps it is this legend, and maybe a very popular advice from psychologists: to wear luxurious underwear to feel self-confidence, consolidated the myth that a beautiful set raises self-esteem.

At first glance, it is. A woman in exquisite lingerie feels more attractive and confident, her look, posture and even gait change. These feelings are familiar to every girl. On the contrary, ladies with low self-esteem believe that there is no need to spend money on new underpants — they are still not visible.

Уверенная или нерешительная: что нижнее белье расскажет о вашей самооценке (не все так просто)

Psychologists often advise you to wear something beautiful to feel more attractive, and the first thing that comes to mind is a little black dress, stilettos, stockings, lace underwear. Imagination immediately draws enthusiastic faces of men and envious ones of women. Their gazes seem to say: “You’re beautiful.” You notice that you are highly appreciated, your own importance is growing at the same time. It would seem that everything is logical, what’s the catch?

Now let’s imagine that you were asked to dress comfortably. Which of the above wardrobe items would be included in the list? Probably nothing. It becomes clear that you choose in favor of making it beautiful for others, and not comfortable for you. That is, initially you focus not on yourself, but on the opinion of other people. Your mood and confidence depend on it. The desire to get approval at any cost, following someone else’s opinion are signs of low self-esteem. Healthy self-esteem is about focusing on yourself. Such a woman does not tolerate discomfort, no matter what – physical or psychological, but defends her boundaries and changes the situation.

Уверенная или нерешительная: что нижнее белье расскажет о вашей самооценке (не все так просто)

Self-esteem for a long time or self-feeling now?

When we put beautiful underwear under our clothes— we feel special, as if we are keeping a secret that no one knows about. But after all, a woman with good self-esteem always feels special, no matter how she looks at the moment and whatever she is wearing. And it is this energy that attracts the eyes of men, and not a mini at all, which causes a lot of inconvenience.

This statement is very well illustrated by the story of Marilyn Monroe.  Once a daring journalist harshly criticized the image of a film star, noting that the actress would not be so desirable without provocative outfits. Soon the most mysterious blonde in Hollywood appeared on posters in a dress made from a potato sack. Needless to say, she looked stunning, and her manic smile continued to break the hearts of men.

It becomes clear that a woman with a healthy self-esteem dresses primarily out of self-love. So, if we talk about underwear, it should be comfortable, pleasant to the body, not to bump into the sides, not to rub with prickly lace. When women with lush breasts choose bras with narrow straps just because it is more aesthetically pleasing, and rub their shoulders — this is not self-love. A person with a strong self-esteem has personal comfort in the first place.

Уверенная или нерешительная: что нижнее белье расскажет о вашей самооценке (не все так просто)

Does this mean that it’s time to forget the advice of psychologists to choose beautiful underwear? Of course not. But you need to understand that working on self-esteem is a deep and long internal work. What happens to you when you put on beautiful underwear or a new dress is a sense of self at the moment. After a week of socks, the novelty gets boring and the inner sense of one’s own luxury begins to decline. Also, do not rush to the extreme and choose only comfortable clothes to the detriment of aesthetics. When buying any thing, ask the question: am I doing this for myself or in the hope of someone else’s approval or admiration?

And finally, let’s look under the clothes of a woman who loves herself. What kind of underwear is in her wardrobe? Of course, it is diverse, neat, without protruding threads and open seams, selected in size and with a comfortable fit based on the individual characteristics of the figure. And this means that if you are comfortable in a thong, choose them. Low or high fit – it all depends on the characteristics of your figure and personal preferences. Seamless or with seams – it’s also up to you to decide what is beautiful and comfortable. But the price is not the most important factor. But if an expensive set is your manifesto of self-love, do not give up, because you deserve it!

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